i was so determined not to have this become a boy-obsessed blog.

edit[x2]:
kris said he liked me.



here we go again...


***


edit:
btw, this was a tiny bit fabricated, just because 1)my timeline was screwed up, and 2)there were other boys besides kris that i didnt mention, but he was always at the back of my mind.


***


which is why i havent posted in nearly a week, since my horrible day.


but i cannot resist temptation.

i know the day i started liking kris.
it was at the end of seventh grade, at the choir banquet.
the next day, i broke up with my 'boyfriend' and told kris i liked him.

now, lets remember, this was seventh grade. anything i say or do should be laughed at, but i shouldnt be mocked for it.

that summer i talked to him alot.
he acted like he liked me.
then he didnt.
then he did.
then i got a boyfriend.
then i broke up w/my boyfriend.
then i met jon.

and got over kris for a full 2 weeks, until jon had to go back to vernon.


the next week i went to camp, and just didnt remember kris.
i was having to much fun telling everyone how crappy a kisser jon was.
and obsessing over a couple boys who were at camp, too.


then i went back to school.
whre i was completely and totally entranced with him and his best friend, shane, for the whole of eighth grade.


over last summer a few things happened here and there.
i went to the mall with him and shane.
i was supposed to get together with shane.
i wanted to jump kris with all my heart.

i didnt see him for the rest of the summer, but we were going to hook up on the fourth of july.
we really were.
his brother was gonna be the... er... chaperone and everything.


until i told him that i probably wasnt gonna stay a virgin till i was married.
when i got the biggest lecture ive ever had.
and learned that jon was back in town.


drama ensues...

sort of...

i called jon, but we never got together.
hes supposed to come into town in a few weeks, though.
we made a deal that hed take me out to breakfast.

anyways, kris stopped lecturing me because i cried.

and i went out to my farm to set off fireworks instead of hooking up with him.

i went to camp a few weeks later.
i always forget about kris at camp.

i sort of hooked up with a kid from church the week before school started.


i saw kris.
i liked kris.
i told kris.


i went to a party where kris was at.
kris flirted.
kris told his friends he didnt like me.
i cried.
i threw a halloween party and told myself i was over him.
i really did like a boy.
his name was john.
this is a different one than the boy from out of town.

the day after the halloween party i found out my dad was really sick.
i cried.
[i tend to do that alot]
i went to youth.
i needed someone.
i met a boy.
i kissed him.


i really only wanted a fling.


that wasnt what happened.

but it didnt really matter.

because i was really and truly over kris.

for two months, the thought of kissing kris made me gag.





and then, it didnt.